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Post by cookie05 on Nov 9, 2005 21:43:17 GMT
Hey guys sorry i havn't been active in a while. Things are happening in my life right now and i'm not copeing with them.
One of them is got to do with one of my best mates taking her own life which i'm still not dealing well with at the moment.
I hope to be active soon. - it's just that my life is falling apart again and i'm just trying to pick up the pieces again.
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Post by Sawyer on Nov 9, 2005 21:44:48 GMT
Oh My God, honey, don't worry about it! *Hugs*
You just worry about sorting yourself out, okay? Our thoughts are with you... I hope things get better for you
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Post by cookie05 on Nov 9, 2005 21:48:27 GMT
*hugz* thanx. things are getting a little better but my life is still a big mess and some days i just don't know what to do.
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Post by Sawyer on Nov 9, 2005 21:51:56 GMT
I know this probably won't help, because when I was on the other end you think "How the hell can anyone know what I'm feeling like?", but it'll get better. You just take one day at a time and keep breathing. If you need to talk, I'm here, 'kay?
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Post by cookie05 on Nov 9, 2005 21:55:17 GMT
thanks.  I worte a poem sot of thing the night i got the phone call from her mother...i couldn't sleep and i'm not much of a talker and so i tend to write things and make them into stories or in this case a poem. you wanna read it? |
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Post by Sawyer on Nov 9, 2005 22:09:20 GMT
Yeah, sure. I tend to write things too... I'd love to read it.
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Post by cookie05 on Nov 9, 2005 23:56:09 GMT
ok here it is. I don't know if you can really call this a poem for i've never written poetry before i'm more of someone who writes creative stories like short stories. Is this what you wanted? [/u] by Sarah Where did it go so wrong? Why did you have to do it? Turning to a bottle of pills was that the only way? what about me? You promised me never again But I guess promises are made to be broken aye? Did you really mean it that day? With those words that you spoke Or was it just some joke? Is this what you wanted? Did you want it to end this way? If I could ask you one last question I knoe what it would be Why? I miss you so much You were my friend What more can I say? These tears just won't go away The pain is here to stay They tell me time will heal all pain But will it ever go? I just don't know anymore There is nothing anyone can say To take this pain away I don't understand you no more Why didn't you come to me? You know you were always welcome to stay I never would have turned away I never could turn my back on you Just so you know I will never forget you It should have never ended this way What more is there to say? R.I.P Samantha 17 years old.[/center] |
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Post by Sawyer on Nov 10, 2005 7:13:12 GMT
Wow. Aww, honey *hugs*
It's seems wierd to say that was a great poem but it was.
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Shannon
The Survivors of Flight 815 
~Like whatever~
Posts: 196
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Post by Shannon on Nov 10, 2005 21:11:10 GMT
I am soo sorry to hear this Eponine, And I feel guilty for hassling you to come on here. Life is not easy at the best of times, but when things like this happen, we just have to face them and deal with it, by doing this it will truly make you a stronger person in the long run, but dealing with the now is the tricky part. So my advice to you is to take each day as it comes, slowly get yourself back on track, I know how you feel truly I do, and I am here to chat any time you wanna ok. take care of yourself and others around you, and I am sending out my strength to you.  |
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Post by cookie05 on Nov 11, 2005 7:12:03 GMT
*gives you guyz a hug* It was really hard for me to sing at her funeral but I managed to do it...I still cry myself to sleep at nights sometimes....but I'm starting to sleep alot better now. But I just miss her so much.
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Post by Angel on Nov 11, 2005 19:07:52 GMT
Hey guys/Girls get this for coincidence. My Granddad Died 11 weeks ago, and he would of been engaged to my Grandmother for 62 years today. Its 62 of the armistice, and its remembered on the 11th month of the 11th hour, how weird is that? So Eponine I know what its like to loose someone close to you, and It does get easier and taking everything in slow motion helps. Remember to eat and sleep and take care of the rest of your loved ones. Find something to keep you busy and also never forget the one you have lost. |
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Post by cookie05 on Nov 12, 2005 16:10:18 GMT
sorry to hear about you Granddad *hugz*
Yeah i've found something to keep me busy...i've been busy with my music since my school has finished for the year and i've been working on my compositions that i have to write for school. I even found thsi jazz piece that I use to always play to her and she would dance around to it and I played it the other day and i ended up crying but it remided me of some of the good times that i had with her....and i really miss those late night phone calls when things weren't going well at home for her. Some nights i just seem to sit up at night with my light on and just look at my phone. I kinda hope that it would ring and it would be her but it never does late at night - that must kinda sound stupid, but i just miss those phone calls even if it did keep me up till 2 am or so in the mornings -
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Post by Sawyer on Nov 12, 2005 16:13:58 GMT
It doesn't sound stupid at all.. I can understand it, since my best mate and I are like that...
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Post by cookie05 on Nov 12, 2005 16:44:32 GMT
cool. I know suicide is not something that anyone should do but the one good thing about this is that her father can't touch her and hurt her no more - i know that may sound kinda bad but if you only saw her after her father had beated her she use to look terrible, she use to say that she fell when other people asked but i knew..i always knew that it was him for that what most of the phone calls were about plus sometimes she would just want to talk.
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